I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
