Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
