I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
