Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize