So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Help. Why am I so naked?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
