I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
