Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
