It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
