Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
