life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
tell me about the fingering
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