if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Im just a social blackout drinker.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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