that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
