Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
