Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
We had sex on a dog bed..
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
