How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
love makes seman taste better
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
