hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
