Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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