she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
