would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
