He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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