Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
