Don't you send me to vm
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
