he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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