Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
