just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
