I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
