Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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