i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
