my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize
