i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Farmville is her only friend.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
