Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
So vagazzling was a success
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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