I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
