Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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