Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
