i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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