i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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