yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
