If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
