i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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