no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
