Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
People in love make me want to vomit
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
