I love black thongs
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
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