everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
