Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
