And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Randomize