peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Randomize
