I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
My penis needs a shock collar
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
