apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize