why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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