You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Randomize