She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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